Shake along with me

As you might imagine, the life of a stay-at-home Dad is quite demanding. There are meals to cook, bills to pay, diapers to change and messes to clean up. Not to brag or anything, but my regular to-do list features a number of items simply brimming with importance. Balancing the checkbook, cleaning out the sink, becoming a master of expressionistic painting, it's all there.

The only problem, however, is for reasons that defy my understanding my regular to-do list never seems to get done. There are plenty of good theories out there. You see, I have an extensive habit of playing college football video games on the playstation. It's possible this activity cuts into my to-do list time. But those cyber-athletes are counting on me! If I don't lead grand ole' Notre Dame into virtual battle, just who will?! What will become of those poor, abandoned cyber-student-athletes living inside my playstation?

Also, I have a nasty habit of staring at the wall for hours while the checkbook sits patiently in front of me. I've been known to ponder the most minute details of my kitchen window while "balancing the checkbook," coming away with loads of priceless information that will be utilized the next time the category of "random kitchen window ponderings" appears on Jeopardy. So there!

I have been able to curtail these distractions long enough to get some actual work done in the past, but now I am faced with a new foe. A foe so strong, so alluring, that I may never be useful again. You see, I have discovered YouTube!

It began innocently enough. I saw a highlight of Oasis on VH1 while preparing to do the dishes, and instantly launched into a full-scale nostalgia attack. Suddenly I was 16 again, the Gallagher brothers were rocking the free world while cursing at each other, and flannel shirts were awesome. I immediately found my way to YouTube and started watching Oasis videos. Five minutes became an hour, an hour became two hours, and before I knew it I had grown a three-foot long beard and Michael was preparing to leave for college. I couldn't stop reliving my youth through small grainy videos on my computer screen!

But it didn't stop there. Oh no. I lapsed into a YouTube trance and somehow ventured to the Barnes and Noble site. It appears that I purchased two CD's that will be arriving at my doorstep tomorrow, perhaps Friday-. Damn you YouTube!! This is all your fault. I don't have money to spend on CD's!! I don't have time to spend all day watching your grainy goodness!! This has to stop!

By the way, nobody told me that Oasis created one of the greatest rock n' roll records of all time! Like everyone else, I was a fan of (What's the Story) Morning Glory and the numerous hits. I just wasn't aware that they had already created a masterpiece known as Definitely Maybe. I defy anyone to listen to tracks like "Rock n Roll Star," or "Cigarettes and Alcohol," and not bounce around the room in rocking bliss! Anyway, this is all your fault YouTube!!

Now if you'll excuse me, I need to watch "Shakermaker" again before painting the house.

Be good kiddies!

- Dave