I finished reading "The Dharma Bums" recently, and I've never read a book that touched me on such a profound level. I'm a guy who dreams about spending time in the mountains on a daily basis, so this book was right up my alley. And after spending the past four years in an out-of-touch with our go-go-go business-minded society role as a stay-at-home dad, I found a kindred spirit in this novel. At last someone who doesn't have it all together and is still searching. Someone questioning the "gotta have a job and a title so I can make money and buy crap in order to be recognized in society and feel like I'm worth something" mentality that we nurture from the moment our kids can talk. "What are you going to 'be' little man?" we ask the three-year-old clutching a stuffed bear and holding a sippie cup. No pressure.
We need to find our Zen, man! And so it goes.
The anti-materialism, anti-going-with-the-crowd messages in "The Dharma Bums" really touched me. Really made me question my values and examine out my goals in life.
So naturally I went out and bought a Wii.
What can I say? These are the times we live in. The real story is far less hypocritical. April and I have been promising Michael a trip to Disneyland this summer, and like the other 99 percent of America dancing along to the recession beat, we've discovered that we just can't afford it right now. So we opted for door number two. We got the little guy the Wii he's been asking for ever since he discovered this magical device at his friend Josh's house. It was just a crazy funny coincidence I was reading "The Dharma Bums" when we made this frivolous purchase.
The Ward castle has since been transformed into a bowling alley, golf course, boxing ring, baseball stadium and tennis court. Michael spends his afternoons blissfully swinging his arms, laughing and gaining precious points. He absolutely loves it.
I've had a rather mixed reaction myself. Apparently if you're a total wuss in real life then your Mii is also a raging wuss. I did what I could. I gave him a cool Euro chin beard and shades. He's wearing Bronco orange and has a cool hair style.
But the son-of-a-you-know-what just cannot hit a freaking home run!! I mean ever!! I've spent hours in front of that blasted TV swinging with all of my might, sweat pouring down my forehead and cussing. Mr. Mii Wuss just keeps popping soft can-of-corn flyballs to the outfield. I heave a mighty swing ... and "pop." Straight up in the air. It's humiliating.
Last night April had a go with her oh-so-pretty Mii. "I'm sure it's really hard," she assured me. First pitch. Baam! Out of the park. The second pitch was a swinging strike. Third pitch. KAAAABLAAAM!!! The ball screams with McGwire-Juice glory straight out of the entire stadium!
Are you freaking kidding me?
When I finally calm down we switch to bowling. I execute what I believe is perfect form, yet the ball continually curves to the right. Three, maybe four pins drop.
"It's okay Daddy," Michael assures me.
The little guy proceeds to unleash his patented "spin in the air, perform herky-jerky windmill with his right arm, and land awkwardly" bowling motion. Naturally the ball rolls right down the middle for a perfect strike. My son is a bit of a Wii bowling prodigy. He bowls five and six strikes in a row. We've had the Wii for less than a week and he's already reached "Pro" status.
I haven't.
So while Michael sets the Wii bowling world on fire, I'll be spending this weekend pouring through the timeless lessons from "The Dharma Bums." Finding your Zen and searching for your inner light and all that. I will. I promise. Just as soon as I hit a freaking home run!!
Here is my favorite quote from "The Dharma Bums" kiddies:
"Everything is all right forever and forever and forever." - Jack Kerouac.
- Dave
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